That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
