there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
