Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Randomize
