we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
