I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
