Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
