A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
