Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i barfeds in our rink
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
