i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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