Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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