the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
