there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
