Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize