Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
