loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
