Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
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