At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Randomize
