I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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