i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
