Pregnant stripper...not hot.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
