He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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