is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
