Pants 0. Shit 1.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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