i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Randomize