I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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