she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
