O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Randomize
