the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
