Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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