How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
