I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
