so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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