okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
