And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
