Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
try to milk me bitch
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