I'm gonna have a badass scar
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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