Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
