that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize