You work out of a Hotel?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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