her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
