Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Did you just see the Batmobile???
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize
