I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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