that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
