Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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