im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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