Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
of course. lets lasso hookers.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
