Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
