So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
