where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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