who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I think I just sharted jello shots
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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